September is over. Classes on campus have begun. My apprentice classes have taken off. The small group that I co-lead (otherwise known as core) is 6 meetings in and 8-10 girls strong. My one on one bible studies are popping up. The transitional dust is finally settling, and I am getting a deeper hold on some of the core values of what life with Jesus is, and will be about: community where the broken can belong, study that will transform your heart, and outreach that extends that same community and study to all nations.
Knowing and understanding my history as a black woman in American, I didn’t trust white people. I had strong reservations about Christianity for a long span of years, but my attitudes and thoughts about Christian community and Jesus have drastically shifted in my journey as a disciple. A large part of that has to do with what I have been blessed to be a part of here in FOCUS's apprenticeship.
This community is a place where people are quick to see you, listen to you, encourage you, love you, and forgive you. A place where differences are not side skirted or ignored, but celebrated and discussed. A place where everyone is empowered to be a leader, and a place where friendship is extended to all who desire it. No matter how much you do or don’t know, and no matter how much you have or haven't experienced, I have witnessed FOCUS be a place that all can come and belong. Even me, this black girl, who had lots of doubt and opinions about white people that claim to love Jesus. The same way they welcomed and loved me, is the same way they welcome and love all. And to me, that is something worth being a part of.
Because of my background of not always being a disciple and not always believing in Jesus, I am consistently stunned at the amount of people at the college age who are hungrily and actively seeking what I used to reject. People really do want deeper connectivity to God and community. The loner in me sometimes finds it hard to see that, yes, people actually do want friends. Seeing FOCUS offer friendship in such an impassioned way encourages me to keep growing into a Christ loving and Christ filled leader. After only a month of leading our cores, several people have attested to the fact that they would have been lonely were it not for FOCUS. In a world where depression and anxiety are at an all time high, especially post covid lockdown, I am confident that the pursuit of, and investment in friendship is work that will last far beyond this college campus. It is the same selfless friendship that Jesus offers to us. It is so special to be a part of such important moments in these student's lives.
On another note, my favorite part of this apprenticeship so far are my apprentice classes. In our study of the Old Testament we have been learning about and discussing things like how to approach reading the ancient and completely foreign text we know as the Bible , to different literary styles within scripture and the cultural implications of their meanings, to discussing different on-going theoretical debates about the Bible, to being able to ask and think through some pretty zany and difficult questions that we've always wanted to know. I love how much we are encouraged to research, think, and discern for ourselves what the will of God is. With guidance from our teachers and experienced ministry leaders, we are figuring out how to understand and practically apply scripture to our daily lives and ministry as we go. There is so much more freedom and room in Christ than I understood! I am thrilled at how much I don't know and how much I will learn!
From the weekly cores that I plan, to the weekly meetings we have as an organization, to my apprentice classes; everything I am doing is cultivating an intrinsic belief in, love of, and dependence on Jesus, far greater than I would have ever imagined. I am confident that when or if I leave FOCUS to go on to a different mission field, my pursuit for Jesus and community will never leave me.
I cannot thank you, my ministry partners, enough for your invaluable contribution to the things I am privileged be doing for God’s kingdom. I wouldn’t be able to grow and learn in these ways that are so valuable to me if it weren’t for your outrageous generosity. You all are DA BOMB!
Below are pictures of my core, my fellow apprentices in one of our classes, and our annual Fall Camp. Enjoy!
